As readers know, we cover Melania Trump  in a manner that Melania’s earned over her five years in real public life and we refuse to grade her on the “Melania curve,” as all other media does. The “Melania curve” is based upon decreased expectations from an immigrant (yes, it is a uniquely American thing and immigrants see it all the time), it comes from the fact that she struggles with the language – which is inexplicable since she’s lived in the United States longer than she lived in Slovenia – and the fact that she is a former “model” and not, say, a former “Harvard Law Graduate” like Michelle Obama or a former librarian like the wonderful (and we mean that) Laura Bush.

Melania does whatever the f*** Melania wants and that is not our opinion, that is based upon fact after fact after fact reported by various sources.

One of the things that Melania has NOT wanted to do is be on the campaign trail with her “husband.” Yes, Melania will happily go on TV during prime time at the convention and deliver an extremely important speech. Yes, Melania will happily redesign the Rose Garden that Jackie Kennedy designed because “why not?” she is First Lady. Melania will blame any and all negative coverage on the media because Melania, like her husband, is perfect and to the extent that perfection doesn’t shine through, it is due to liberal media.

One thing Melania refused to do? Go on the campaign trail. We wrote a story over a month ago that Melania had drawn a line in the sand. She would not be going on the campaign trail. (Getting COVID helped). Why on Earth would she get on a plane to go to Oshkosh Wisconsin in late October when she has a tennis pavilion in a big white palace where chefs make what she wants to eat, not Big Macs? Why would she want to get on a plane and go to St. Petersburg Florida when just twenty more minutes in the air would have her in Mar-a-Lago?

Why?

Well, it appears that she has figured out that she’s about to lose all these little privileges, including the right to control the FBI’s questions about that pesky inauguration thing if her husband loses, which was never part of the plan! Someway, somehow, when everyone had to pull a lever in a ballot box, Trump felt assured of a win. We hate talking about that because it sends us down rabbit holes where snakes live. Now with all these ballots being mailed in and her husband well behind, she understands that staying home might be a good way to lose that “home.”

So guess who’s going to Erie Pennsylvania tomorrow?

NEW: @FLOTUS will make a rare appearance with Trump at tomorrow night's rally in Erie, PA per @kristincbrown

— Weijia Jiang (@weijia) October 19, 2020

There is NOTHING wrong with Erie Pennsylvania in our minds. But we can guess that there is plenty wrong with it in Melania’s mind.

Why is she suddenly going? Because they have to humanize Trump, make him more likable. (They’re desperate). One way to make him more likable is to have someone there to prove that she likes him – though, we get it, her presence proves nothing, but go with it. There is also another sneaky reason. Recall, Melania had COVID, too. If Melania is out on the trail, “lookin’ good” well, then we can call COVID “over,” can we not?

And we definitely need to call it over, because as long as it’s still a “thing,” like it is, going up now in the vast majority of states, Trump loses. Period.

So Melania’s going on the trail. THAT, fellow Democrats, is a very good sign.

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Peace, y’all
Jason
[email protected] and on Twitter @JasonMiciak