Politics - News Analysis

Don Jr. Whines That He Worked Much Harder Than Hunter Biden and Twitter Has Some Thoughts

We are unaware of Donald Jr. ever holding a real job outside of the Trump Organization. We do know that he wanted to join the military, but upon doing the numbers as to the possible cost-benefit of being kicked out of the will and disinherited by his dad – should he do so, he decided he would not pursue his dream.

Actually, had he told his dad, “I’m a fcking adult, if I want to join the military, I’m doing it, and you can do whatever you want with the money you pretend to have,” we’d probably all have to respect the hell out of that.

Fortunately, it didn’t happen. Instead, we got this jackass:

How did his phone not blow up? How did it not “reject” that tweet as “too embarrassing to come from this device” – some sort of feature like that? What did Junior start at? $16/hour? Was he with others who were in their first year and beat out the others as The Apprentice? Come on.

And can he please explain how it was that Joe gave his son China when it is Junior’s dad who withdrew $15 million from a secret Chinese bank account he just “forgot” to report in his financial disclosures? We were unaware of the fact that Hunter owned China, nice place, though. Damn good food. We would settle to just own Hong Kong, best deep water port in Southern Asia, how did Hunter score that deal?

When did Joe actually “acquire” China so that it became his to give to Hunter? And since Joe isn’t really rich, but needed some money when Beau was sick, why didn’t Joe keep China for a while? We are so confused! So is the U.S.!

Which, we might add, many people would consider a problem.

This, below, is ACTUALLY true:

We love that tweet because we cannot imagine what it must feel like to have a mountain – literally a mountain – of water about to fall over you. I guess we can ask Trump soon enough.

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Peace, y’all
Jason
[email protected] and on Twitter @JasonMiciak

meet the author

Jason Miciak is a political writer, features writer, author, and attorney. He is originally from Canada but grew up in the Pacific Northwest. He now enjoys life as a single dad raising a ridiculously-loved young girl on the beaches of the Gulf Coast. He is very much the dreamy mystic, a day without learning is a day not lived. He is passionate about his flower pots and studies philosophical science, religion, and non-mathematical principles of theoretical physics. Dogs, pizza, and love are proof that God exists. "Above all else, love one another."

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