Politics - News Analysis

Matt Gaetz Loves Trump So Much, He Doesn’t Mind Trump Calling Him a Criminal

Matt Gaetz.

Where does one even begin? Well, certainly not with Nestor because once one dives into that topic there are going to be nothing but more questions. Given that today we’ve dedicated ourselves to answers, we’re not going there.

How did he get elected in the first place? Well, one has to understand, he represents Florida’s first district, which – if we’re honest, consists of Pensacola, and everything around Pensacola. His district is far more like southern Alabama, Mississippi, and Georgia, than anything around … any other part of Florida. All one has to do is win the Republican primary and one wins. Speaking of which, having a very wealthy politically connected dad and being a good looking guy, well – one’s on his way.

His DUIs? Did we mention the wealthy father and rural area consisting mostly of like Southern Alabama, Georgia, and Mississippi? It really helps to have those connections because things just have a weird way of disappearing.

Again, Nestor? Jesus, your guess is as good as ours but that could be everything from the sweetest thing he’s ever done to the sickest, and we’ll never know. We should point out that if this was a very positive thing with a positive story, it would almost surely have come out in the campaign, right?

Anyway, Matt Gaetz claim to fame, beyond being part of a club that give points for sleeping with staff members and all kinds of other “not adult” types of things, is also just about the biggest Trumper in Congress.

But despite the fact that Gaetz may be the biggest Trumper in Congress, Trump keeps calling him “Rick Gates.” Rick Gates is the man right now who has a criminal record for which his father cannot work hit out from. So why is it so tough for Trump to keep the two apart? “Rick,” “Matt.” “Gates, Gaetz.”

Could it possibly be because they have both been willing to commit crimes for Trump at various points? We are TOTALLY speculating. But there is something connecting these two, and maybe it’s Trump’s medical regiment, or maybe it’s something deeper. We are just fascinated by Matt Gaetz, and – in the pool of people one believes may see prison time if the Trump administration ends abruptly in January, the Gates/Gaetz may have more in common that a similar last name.

But Nestor is all Gaetz, that we know.

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Peace, y’all
Jason
[email protected] and on Twitter @JasonMiciak

meet the author

Jason Miciak is a political writer, features writer, author, and attorney. He is originally from Canada but grew up in the Pacific Northwest. He now enjoys life as a single dad raising a ridiculously-loved young girl on the beaches of the Gulf Coast. He is very much the dreamy mystic, a day without learning is a day not lived. He is passionate about his flower pots and studies philosophical science, religion, and non-mathematical principles of theoretical physics. Dogs, pizza, and love are proof that God exists. "Above all else, love one another."

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