There are stories within Stephanie Winston-Wolkoff’s book Melania and Me that literally leave one wondering if there has ever been a more entitled person on Earth – including Donald J. Trump, current president of the United States – than one, “Melania Trump” – whose only job is to be wife of the president and every once in a while appear to do something nice. Apparently, the job doesn’t even require smiling while doing that nice thing because she can’t even do that correctly, or often enough.

According to Winston-Wolkoff, Melania felt “constrained” by the plane that was dedicated to the FLOTUS’s use to get her from DC to NYC to do important FLOTUS work like get her hair done, see some “friends” (and we’ve heard rumors that they’re not just ladies who lunch, but service men, if you know what we mean. And NO, we have no proof, we’re reporting a simple rumor).

The primary feud was between Melania Trump and Lindsay Reynolds, her former chief of staff. Winston-Wolkoff heard about the feud through a text while sitting in a press conference. In what was described as a HUGE POINT OF CONTENTION between the East Wing (FLOTUS) and West Wing (“Jackass”), Melania fully believed she deserved a bigger plane and one with damned wifi! (The trip to NYC could not possibly take more than 45 minutes, could it? Not if you didn’t have to through baggage, all that). Although she also used the plane to fly to Palm Beach for spa weekends at Mar-a-Lago, which is obviously a longer flight.

Eventually, it all got worked out through a trade and Melania got her larger dedicated jet. Melania would give up a room in the East Wing (space is a premium) normally used for gift-wrapping (which is embarrassing to have a room dedicated to such a task anyway), to the military, which would then agree to give her a bigger plane. Except, no one told Melania about the deal (it was made behind her back by her chief of staff and the military). Stephanie was furious because no one should go behind Melania’s back, but space in the East Wing is at a premium and Reynolds gave it away in exchange for the military giving Melania a bigger plane.

Melania was given the use of the Boeing C-40 Clipper, which is basically a souped up 737. For overseas trips she does use a larger plane, the plane normally used by Mike Pence.

Now, IF we wanted to be mean, we can think of plenty of other things Melania could’ve traded to get the bigger plane, stuff that she’d know fully about and to which she’d agree. But we’d much prefer to concentrate on the fact that Melania feels so entitled that having her OWN plane to get back and forth to wherever she wanted to go was simply not good enough, it had to be a bigger, roomier, plane for reasons you can speculate upon for yourselves. And it was a big enough deal that it caused a lot of palace intrigue.

Jesus, these people.

****

Peace, y’all
Jason
[email protected] and on Twitter @JasonMiciak