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Kushner Gets a Book Deal, the ‘Definitive Account’ of Trump Admin: Twitter Spills on Itself Laughing

Anyone around here long enough to have read our “definitive” columns on Jared Kushner knows we save some extra adrenaline for Kush when it comes to ripping the entire Trump administration. Kushner is the one with blood on his hands, or most of it, two times over.

So Kushner has a book deal. One might initially be shocked. He and Ivanka are reportedly worth $750 million or so. He will make as much money sitting on his couch watching Gilligan’s Island as he will making, what? Ten million on a book? Maybe more, less? Who cares? He doesn’t need the money, he can make as much staring at the wall drinking Grape Crush.  But this isn’t about making money, it is about whitewashing, minimizing, fogging over, self-promoting, and getting back in touch with his MAGA side, fast. Ideally, before any charges come out. Charges better be coming, sooner rather than later. There is a chance the little sh*t admits something that prosecutors can use as evidence, though a den of criminal lawyers will likely scrub it sterile before publishing, impacting the whole point that much more.

It is already causing controversy. The Guardian [1]:

Broadside Books, a conservative imprint of HarperCollins Publishers, announced that Kushner’s book will come out in early 2022. Kushner has begun working on the memoir, currently untitled, and is expected to write about everything from the Middle East to criminal justice reform to the pandemic. Financial terms were not disclosed.

The signing of the Kushner deal comes amid a debate in the book industry over which Trump officials, notably Trump himself, can be taken on without starting a revolt at the publishing house. Thousands of Simon & Schuster employees and authors signed an open letter this spring condemning the publisher’s decision to sign up former vice-president Mike Pence.

A revolt? That’s putting it lightly. See above, no administration lied as much as this one, none had the corruption, Jared has more blood on his hands than anyone, and they collectively incited a riot. They shouldn’t be getting book deals, they should be getting charges. A publishing house would feel awfully stupid paying a big advance for a book, printing it, sending it out, only to have to pull copies as “definitive” charges came out.

Broadside said on Tuesday: “His book will be the definitive, thorough recounting of the administration, and the truth about what happened behind closed doors.”

Oh, GTH. Seriously. The only way we’re getting close to a “definitive account” is if two people very high in the administration get immunity to testify and corroborate each others’ stories.  Or it comes out in drips through the NYT and WaPo. Everyone in that administration had an angle, Kushner might have a circle.

As for revolt? No administration lied like the Trump administration. No one in the administration – with one possible exception – had a bigger reason to lie. Jared told his own outright lies and he lied through various sources. But two particular lies stand out.

Somehow, Jared became buddies with MBS, one of the world’s most craven monsters, somehow Jared got a security clearance, somehow we heard reports that Jared always wanted to read about the Middle East, but not in relation to his “Arab-Israeli peace process.” Somehow MBS got ahold of some highly sensitive information he used to crack down on his rivals and dissidents, we suspect much of it was as brutal as Khashoggi. And somehow, Jared got the worst financing agreement on earth cleaned up and refinanced… by folks in the UAE who may have been front men for god only knows how many levels from there. Make of that what you will. We suspect Jared will either lie his ass off or lie by omission by not addressing it at all.

And other big one, maybe the biggest. Jared will lie about encouraging Trump to dump the worst of the COVID tragedy on the states, in particular, the blue states, New York, Washington, California, the ones hammered in the beginning. It was a political issue to the administration. Jared didn’t have the foresight nor the inclination to worry about the consequences. As with everything else, Jared misread it because the consequences caused them to lose the election. Jared has to address COVID. We won’t believe a single word of “the definitive account.”

NOR, will the internet, which had one hell of a time as “Kushner” trended throughout the day.

We read this one.

Jesus, this guy.

Peace, y’all
[email protected] and on Twitter @JasonMiciak