Politics - News Analysis

Mike Lindell Announces Trump’s New Reinstatement Date and Twitter Can’t Stop Laughing

Thanksgiving:

Turkey getting stuffed (Stuffing should be cooked inside the bird unless someone is prepared to call it something else), early in the morning, preferably 7:30 to 8:00, to slow cook the turkey, beautiful fall arrangements around the table, ideally, some family or good friends over – all vaxed up – some football, eat about 2:30-3:30, ideal time, pumpkin pie (there should be a law requiring such), nap nap nap, something about turkey, kids even like a movie late in the day, all while enjoying the fact that it is the last day on which one doesn’t have to feel guilty that Christmas shopping isn’t done. It is America’s best secular holiday. One might even be thankful for all one has, even if it’s not that much, it’s more than some.

And what better thing to add than to give thanks that Donald Trump will be reinstated as president? Admittedly, to most of us, it would be better if the oven caught fire, the bird went down to ashes, and it led to a fistfight among family, but to some MAGAs, it would be the most thankful day in history even if McD’s chicken nuggets were on the menu. Mike Lindell has a new reinstatement date:

“Originally I had hoped for August and September. I asked all the lawyers just yesterday. We are taking this case to the Supreme Court before Thanksgiving. Now maybe Fox will report that today.

The SCOTUS doesn’t unilaterally declare winners of elections, but go on:

“You heard it here first because our case is ready. We are bringing it to the Supreme Court before Thanksgiving. This evidence is 100% non-subjective evidence. The Supreme Court, they’re going to vote 9-nothing to take it in.

We heard it here first and last. The lawyers can bring it today, the decision will be out tomorrow. The SCOTUS will be up at 7:30 stuffing the turkey…

“We will have this before the Supreme Court before Thanksgiving. That’s my promise to the people of this country. We’re all in this together. We worked very hard on this.” – Mike Lindell, today on Steve Bannon’s webcast.

We will be thankful knowing with certainty that Joe Biden will still be president on Thanksgiving. Do not over or undercook the bird folks, cut the breast from the dark meat beforehand. White meat cooks faster than dark meat, which is why one should pull the white meat out first and keep cooking the dark meat. And put the stuffing in the bird or call it casserole for the love of god.

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Twitter had a field day:

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[email protected] and on Twitter @JasonMiciak

meet the author

Jason Miciak is a political writer, features writer, author, and attorney. He is originally from Canada but grew up in the Pacific Northwest. He now enjoys life as a single dad, writing from the beaches of the Gulf Coast, getting advice from his beloved daughter and teammate. He is very much the dreamy mystic that cannot add and loves dogs more than most people. He also likes studying cooking, theoretical physics, cosmology, and quantum mechanics. He likes pizza.

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