Opinion

JD Vance Is About to Be on Melania Trump’s Sh*t List After He Reveals One of Her ‘Beauty Secrets’ in Twitter Photo

I bet she's furious.

It looks like Melania Trump’s smile isn’t the only technically human but totally fake thing she wears on her head. With a candid photo of Melania and the president-elect from inside the New York Stock Exchange, JD Vance made a classic blunder: Always warn a woman if you’re going to take a picture of her to put on social media.

It was meant to be an inspiring photo, with a caption from Vance reading “Ready to ring the bell on the New York Stock Exchange.
President Trump will lead a great American comeback!”

But after Vance posted the picture of the Trumps watching the big screen at the NYSE before going in to ring the opening bell, users noticed telltale signs of a common beauty secret that Melania has never admitted to using. It turns out Melania’s chestnut tresses are not all her own.

The photo is taken from behind the Trumps as they gaze at the scene they’re about to join. And don’t get me wrong — it’s far less flattering to Trump, who can be seen sporting an enormous bald spot at the crown of his head. But Melania’s hair is parted in a completely unnatural place, showing what Wigonia’s Julia North says are “tape-in or beaded-row extensions.”

North, the founder of the London-based luxury wig maker, went on. “You can spot the telltale signs where the natural hair meets the extension pieces, particularly visible in the mid-sections.” North was a hairstylist for 15 years and a specialist in hair extensions.

“I’d say she’s likely wearing premium quality, European human hair extensions, probably 18 to 20 inches in length,” North explained. She said that the work was likely done with a hybrid system of the two styles of extensions.

Seraphine Nurse, another stylist specializing in this type of hair art, agreed. “[The] fullness and texture at the ends are often signs of added volume or length,” she said, and that it’s likely it’s “clip-ins or tape-ins for a seamless look.”

North had a deeper analysis, detailing why Melania would make the choice and explaining the different lengths of hair that the former and future FLOTUS has been showing off lately:

This is actually a very common choice for public figures because it allows for versatile styling while maintaining natural movement. The color work is excellent though — they’re perfectly matched to her natural shade, which is crucial for seamless blending.

What’s interesting is that in different public appearances, you can see varying degrees of volume and length, which suggests she likely alternates between different extension sets depending on the event and styling needs.

This is a smart approach that many high-profile clients use to protect their natural hair while maintaining their signature look.

It actually reminds me of my U.S. History teacher at Eastmont High School back in 1992. He was so sensitive about his baldness that not only did he wear a toupée, but he actually had three different hairpieces to make it seem as if his hair was growing and he was getting haircuts. We all felt bad that he was so insecure about it, except the seniors. One of them would make it their “senior prank” to run up to him and snatch him bald-headed every year.

One stylist to the stars, Mia Santiago from New York, was even more adamant that Melania’s hair was fake. “Beyond being able to see what looks like a tape-in in her hair, you can tell by the curl pattern,” Mia said. “Extensions can hold curl more tightly than finer hair, so you can see where the real hair is less wavy and the extensions have more curl. That’s always a tell.”

Readers, I ran this by my girlfriend, who has been a hairdresser for 30 years. She’s done everything you can imagine doing to someone’s hair, from children’s cuts to bridal styles, extensions, perms, coloring, and the like, and she’s stayed current on all of the latest styles and fashions the entire time.

I read her the quotes from the stylists above to see if it lined up with her experience. She shook her head at Santiago’s “always a tell” remark, saying that this assumes that the client has finer hair than what the extensions are made from.

I showed my girl the picture just now, and I said, “Can you tell that these are hair extensions from this photo?” She said yes, of course she could, but I asked her how. “Because you can freaking see them.”

That’s all I need to know.

meet the author

Andrew is a dark blue speck in deep red Central Washington, writing with the conviction of 18 years at the keyboard and too much politics to even stand. When not furiously stabbing the keys on breaking news stories, he writes poetry, prose, essays, haiku, lectures, stories for grief therapy, wedding ceremonies, detailed instructions on making doughnuts from canned biscuit dough (more sugar than cinnamon — duh), and equations to determine the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. A girlfriend, a dog, two cats, and two birds round out the equation, and in his spare time, Drewbear likes to imagine what it must be like to have spare time.

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