Politics - News Analysis

Lindsey Graham Claims 40,000 Brazilians With ‘Gucci Bags’ are Heading to Connecticut

The MAGAs need to decide what it is that they want from immigrants – or lack thereof. Do they want to keep out poor, diseased, refugees (because what’s what we’ve been hearing), or do they want to keep out wealthy, Gucci-carrying, plastic-cosmetic buttocks… brown people.

Wait, we might have hit upon a common denominator. Lindsey Graham is now upset – not as about Haitian Refugees, no – goodness, we all knew he’d be furious about that, but now Lindsey is upset about wealthy Brazilians pouring in across our burdens with their Gucci bags and…

Sen. Lindsey Graham is claiming that immigrants from Brazil are entering the US via the Mexican border “wearing designer clothes and Gucci bags.” 

Graham made this statement to Fox News host Sean Hannity on Tuesday while criticizing the Biden administration’s border policy. 

“We had 40,000 Brazilians come through the Yuma Sector alone headed for Connecticut wearing designer clothes and Gucci bags,” the South Carolina senator claimed on Fox News. “This is not economic migration anymore. People see an open America. They’re taking advantage of us. And it won’t be long before a terr*rist gets in this crowd.”

We were of the impression that Graham was against economic migration?… Oh, wait, it’s migration of any type, except all those Russian anchor babies down in Little Moscow in Florida, those are apparently not an issue.

We would also really like a citation for Lindsey’s assertion. After all, sites like ours get checked all the time to make sure we’re citing facts that are well-sourced, is it too much to ask of a U.S. Senator?

Wait, Lindsey had a source because he’s apparently been there, or at least heard reports:

Usually, when you go to the border, you see people who are dressed really haggardly and who look like they’ve been through hell,” he told The Post. “This time at Yuma, there were dozens that looked like they were checking into a hotel, and smartly dressed.”

“This is something new. I would advise the Biden administration to do what the Obama administration did and fly them back,” Graham said, adding that he thought Connecticut and two other states he could not immediately recall were “destinations.

It really is sick. We first hear about the “dirty, diseased, immigrants that are going to come in and commit crimes and spread disease,” and now we have to hear about people who are too well off…

Or, Lindsey is simply making all this up in his head to create an issue on Fox News? We think we have found two seamless truths, the keeping our brown brothers and sisters out, and saying something that sounds good on Fox News.

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meet the author

Jason Miciak is a political writer, features writer, author, and attorney. He is originally from Canada but grew up in the Pacific Northwest. He now enjoys life as a single dad raising a ridiculously-loved young girl on the beaches of the Gulf Coast. He is very much the dreamy mystic, a day without learning is a day not lived. He is passionate about his flower pots and studies philosophical science, religion, and non-mathematical principles of theoretical physics. Dogs, pizza, and love are proof that God exists. "Above all else, love one another."

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