Politics - News Analysis

Rick Scott’s Fundraising Email for Trump is the Most Pathetic Thing You’ll See All Day

THIS NEVER HAPPENS!

You have been selected as a top Political Flare supporter to have the opportunity to buy dinner for features writer Jason Miciak. You will have an opportunity to order drinks, order Gulf Shrimp Kabob appetizers, and a Cesar Salad. Your dream dinner will also include the opportunity to buy Jason Miciak a “Cowboy Cut” USDA Prime Ribeye (You know, the kind with the bone sticking out, the cool kind?). Nothing but the best from our top Flare readers.

Over dinner you will have the opportunity to listen to Jason talk about anything you wish; You may want to discuss the only acceptable toppings for pizza, the joy of raising 14-year-old girls as an old guy, Trump, NHL hockey, dogs – especially the undervalued American mutt, or how cool it would be to meet Joe Biden… together!

But hurry now, you have been selected as a top Political Flare reader and must answer within 30 minutes, or your opportunity to buy Jason dinner will go to another top Political Flare reader that…

Why can’t they come up with new material? Is it because this is the stuff that the MAGAs just eat up?

Was the crisis in Afghanistan surrounding the pull out of American Troops Biden's fault or Trump's fault?

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This email looks exactly like every email we’ve ever received from the Trump campaign (don’t ask, blame the lovely owner of this website

Everyone who gets an email from Trump is one of his top supporters, even those of us who have never sent him money but have written hundreds of articles about why he’s the biggest jackass and threat to democracy and decency in the country right now.

And what is really sad is that these nimrods really do likely believe that they’re about to have a strategy session with Trump. Trump didn’t have a strategy with his own people! And, as everyone knows, the average MAGA is not going to be let anywhere near one of Trump’s clubs.

Idiots.

Now, we can get back to the real offer, the opportunity to buy Jason Miciak dinner. If you take advantage of the offer in the next ten minutes, the gift will be matched and you will have the opportunity to buy dinner for a 14 year old girl, as well.

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[email protected] and on Twitter @JasonMiciak

meet the author

Jason Miciak is a political writer, features writer, author, and attorney. He is originally from Canada but grew up in the Pacific Northwest. He now enjoys life as a single dad, writing from the beaches of the Gulf Coast, getting advice from his beloved daughter and teammate. He is very much the dreamy mystic that cannot add and loves dogs more than most people. He also likes studying cooking, theoretical physics, cosmology, and quantum mechanics. He likes pizza.

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