Politics - News Analysis

Eric Trump Wants You to Know He Wasn’t Spoiled as a Kid: He Flew COACH to Europe, Not the Concorde

Given that a massive lawsuit was filed today, one that named Eric Trump and his adult siblings (Other than Tiffany), one that could lead to criminal charges filed by either the IRS or the S.D.N.Y., Eric Trump believed it was important that people know that he wasn’t raised as some spoiled rich kid in Manhattan. Had Eric said that he grew up miserably, and hated himself because his father ignored him, we’d believe him 100%, and some of us might – might – feel a little bad about that. (Though lots of kids grow up unloved by either or both parents but not with such privilege.)

He lived in a massive condo in mid-town Manhattan, went to a private school, and never had to worry about money for clothes or, really, anything. That is proof that Eric grew up privileged. Very few kids could claim the same.

So why is he even bothering trying to convince people that he wasn’t privileged? He would get far more credit for saying, “I am very aware of how lucky I was and that I grew up incredibly privileged. I also know that there are a lot of kids that didn’t have the opportunities I had.”

Well, the explanation is quite easy. He is Eric Trump, or what many people call “the dumb one.” We aren’t ready to concede that Eric is dumber than the other two. There seems to be an ongoing competition for the single stupidest one. Many people think Ivanka is a little smarter than the other two. We aren’t falling for it. Just because Ivanka is extremely attractive physically and very ugly personally doesn’t make her smarter. Regardless, Eric does make a solid effort on a daily basis to lay claim to “the dumb one,” and here is his latest effort. From our friend Ron:

Okay. Yes. We call absolute BS on this laying stone and cutting rebar as an 11-12 year old. That wouldn’t even be safe. In fact, WE would step in and say it’s not safe to have a kid that age at a construction site! IF IF IF he ever had a “duty at all, which is ridiculous on its face, he should have been a sandwich maker for the men (it was the 80s) working at the site!

Plus, flying coach to Europe? Fck you, Eric! A lot of kids haven’t flown to Boise to see Grandma.

What a dick.

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[email protected], @JasonMiciak, with Nicole Hickman

meet the author

Jason Miciak is a political writer, features writer, author, and attorney. He is originally from Canada but grew up in the Pacific Northwest. He now enjoys life as a single dad raising a ridiculously-loved young girl on the beaches of the Gulf Coast. He is very much the dreamy mystic, a day without learning is a day not lived. He is passionate about his flower pots and studies philosophical science, religion, and non-mathematical principles of theoretical physics. Dogs, pizza, and love are proof that God exists. "Above all else, love one another."

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