I wouldn’t want to be Donald Trump right now. I mean yeah, I would love to pay able to pay my rent and not worry about whether I have enough left to pay the rest of my bills, but man, I wouldn’t want to be facing all these charges, even for a ton of money.

Tomorrow Trump is turning himself in to the Fulton County Jail and it’s not exactly Mar-a-Lago. It’s going to rock Trump’s world, and not in a good way. It’s no fancy federal building. It’s a JAIL. In Atlanta. Side note, did you know “Jail” was spelled “Gaol” in Australia for years and many people there still use that spelling? Moving on. Trump is undoubtedly a mess, taking his Imodium and anti-diarrheal medication and yes, that makes me happy.

So Trump woke screaming, and started with, “NOBODY HAS EVER FOUGHT FOR ELECTION INTEGRITY LIKE PRESIDENT DONALD J. TRUMP. FOR DOING SO, I WILL PROUDLY BE ARRESTED TOMORROW AFTERNOON IN GEORGIA. GOD BLESS THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!!!”

LOL, the man lies like we breathe. It’s truly insane.

Then he moved on and cried like a baby, saying “For the first time in three years, brave American Patriots will be able, in Court, to show how the Presidential Election of 2020 was RIGGED & STOLLEN. For those RINOS, Radical Left Democrats, Communists, Marxists, Fascists , & others who say, “Don’t Look Back, Look Forward,” they either do not want to reveal the answers because they “got away with murder,” or are FOOLS & COWARDS because we now know the answers to all of the Fraud, Irregularities, & Cheating, & WE CANNOT LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN!”

Then this which is laughable, “MY INTERVIEW WITH TUCKER CARLSON WILL BE AIRED TONIGHT AT 9:00 P.M. “SPARKS WILL FLY.” ENJOY!”

I’m sure lots of MAGAs will tune in, to watch Trump lie and watch Tucker allow it. Yawn.

Then Trump posted like 30 links and images in like an hour, including posts from Laura Loomer, that horrible woman who calls herself a “Proud Islamaphobe”. How nice.

Then this was odd. He posted a poll showing he was winning…but that Lauren Boebert was losing? Does the Orange Menace not like the GED-having 36-year old grandmother?

Then he posted a month-old article about CROWD SIZE, as a narcissist is wont to do:

Of course he posted an article slamming Fani Willis, and one from the Daily Caller so you know it’s fair.

And there are just so many more. Probably 40 posts today and it’s still the afternoon. Tonight is the Republican debate and of course Trump chickened out. And believe it or not, Fox News called him out for it. Well, Trump’s campaign had some thoughts about that and said there was no need for Trump to attend since he already won? In a lengthy statement paid for by Trump’s campaign, Trump Campaign Senior Advisor Chris LaCivita went right after the Fox News moderators:

“President Trump has already won this evening’s debate because everything is going to be about him. Only President Trump has the policy ideas, the fortitude, and the polling to go head-to-head with Crooked Joe Biden in the general election. Republican voters recognize this, hence President Trump’s 62-16 lead in the GOP primary.

You should also expect the Fox hosts to show an unnatural obsession with President Trump tonight, asking other Republican candidates over and over to react to President Trump’s policy positions. In fact, we will be tallying the number of times President Trump’s name is brought up, and his total ‘speaking time,’ even though he is not in attendance.”

Of course they couldn’t tell the truth. That Trump’s big ol’ fanny will be attached to the toilet tonight as he imagines what will happen tomorrow, when he must turn his criminal ass in, and all the humiliation that comes with it. And it’s about time.

UPDATE:

He’s not stopping. Trump just screamed, “The greatest Mayor in the history of New York City was just ARRESTED in Atlanta, Georgia, because he fought for Election Integrity. THE ELECTION WAS RIGGED & STOLLEN. HOW SAD FOR OUR COUNTRY. MAGA!”

And for the LAST TIME, “stolen” is what didn’t happen in the 2020 election. “Stollen” is a delicious German Christmas pastry.

And then more screaming, saying “The greatest Mayor in the history of New York City was just ARRESTED in Atlanta, Georgia, because he fought for Election Integrity. THE ELECTION WAS RIGGED & STOLLEN. HOW SAD FOR OUR COUNTRY. MAGA!”

It just never ends. Hopefully once he’s locked up for good, they’ll take away his phone.