Politics - News Analysis
Rumors are Wrong: Marjorie Taylor Greene Doesn’t Have Three Toes — She Has at Least Four and Twitter is in Hysterics
Okay, this is an older story we are re-running because Marjorie Taylor Greene has really been angering us as of late. She’s a horrible woman, an open white nationalist, and somehow has gained tremendous power in the Republican Party. When she won, most people thought it was a fluke and she’d be a one-term congresswoman. But nope, not only did she win again, she has more power than ever. Just this week a bill of hers passed lowering the salary of the Secretary of Defense, Lloyd Austin, to $1.
The woman is awful. When she was elected and wasn’t given any committee assignments, I had some hope. That Republicans realized they went too far in allowing that beast into the hallowed House Chamber. But nope. Not only have they totally accepted her with open arms, she has more power than many congress members who has been there decades. It’s just not ok. So, we are going to be petty on this Friday night, and talk about her ugly freaking feet.
So, let me introduce you to three-toes. Or four-toes.
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Alright.
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First, we almost never, ever, ever make fun of any sort of body condition or aging issue (We slammed liberals who teased “diaper Don” and told them to be careful unless they get younger each day, Karma can be very specific). So this is really out of character for us.
But since the number of toes one has really isn’t something that anyone truly cares about… mostly, and mostly because it’s Marjorie Taylor Greene, we’re going after her. She has been unbelievably cruel to others and, as we said, Karma and all.
There has always been a rumor that Marjorie has only three toes which would kind of fit her reptilian brain and attitude. But we now have some indisputable evidence that she has at least four… and no real indication that there are any more hidden somewhere. This, of course, was all that Twitter needed to have an evening’s worth of entertainment in ripping her by mocking her. Again, these are highly unusual circumstances, we generally don’t do this.
But:
Everyone speculating after the beach photos a while back that she has 3 toes have been proven wrong. She definitely has at least 4. pic.twitter.com/tGmZJImacs
— Ron Filipkowski (@RonFilipkowski) May 5, 2022
Yeah, and they’re off and running on Twitter:
First the Cawthorn tape, now this … fix it, Jesus. 🤮
— Diana Prince (@DianaPr1nc) May 5, 2022
I've spoken to several professional big game trackers and they just can't seem to identify what kind of hoof that is.
— Say it loud, say it proud, 46! (@leap441) May 5, 2022
And you know she was there to get some. There isn’t enough Viagra in the world.
— Gailen David (@gailendavid) May 5, 2022
Ewww…some people shouldn’t wear open toe shoes.
— Rosie Glow (@rosieglow2010) May 5, 2022
Why oh why would she wear open-toed shoes with feet like that and not even have a pedicure? Yuck! 🤮
— CHEERS! 🍻 🥂🇨🇦 🇺🇸 (@brandy_cheers) May 5, 2022
I think I'd rather see the Cawthorn video. 🤢 https://t.co/dFs0wJOtjK
— Queen Thicktoria, Esq. (@VeeCeeMurphy76) May 6, 2022
Some folks shouldn't wear open toe Heels.
Fred flintstone Feet. https://t.co/wj8lcz7RZb
— a Rigger from the Chi (@reesetheone1) May 5, 2022
However, we must be fair. As reported by Snopes, Marj does indeed have 5 toes on each foot. They are just positioned in an odd way, probably from her years of working out and weight training and Crossfit:
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