Politics - News Analysis

This Hilariously Photoshopped Photo of Trump’s ‘Sexy’ Lawyer Shows Where Her Priorities Lie

Something tells me she'd be happier if his trial were televised.

One of Trump’s favorite users on Twitter, Dom Lucre, posted a picture of the former president’s lawyer, Alina Habba, at Mar-a-Lago. Now, obviously Trump’s going to invite her there — she is his lawyer. But it sure seems like perhaps he extended an invitation so he could see her in a bikini.

And she certainly doesn’t seem to mind. She’s a little obsessed with Donald Trump. Her own Instagram account is filled with nothing but pictures of the future convicted felon, and Trump events, Trump rallies, Trump memes — Trump everything.

But the picture that Dom Lucre posted with the caption “Donald Trump’s Lawyer Alina Habba at Mar-A-Lago…” is a little bit of self-propaganda for Habba.

Sure, she’s got a pretty face. But only those who are deeply concerned with their own physique manipulate photos like this. It looks like it already could have been a pretty good picture of her. Instead, all of the hallmarks of a poor attempt at perfection through Photoshop are there.

Looks like a beautiful day in Florida! Hardly any wind, a clear blue sky, and a pool nearly all to herself. But wait! What’s this? Has physics gone haywire? It couldn’t be.

Surely it’s the sheer force of her genius lawyering that has mysteriously bent the pole on the umbrella behind her. Her massive attorney brain has obviously curve the concrete columns of Trump’s mansion. This is clearly the fully natural waistline of a borderline courtroom master.

If I didn’t know better, I’d say that Alina Habba thinks she’s as gorgeous as she is good at representing Trump in a court of law. Unfortunately for her, she’s mostly right. She puts on a good show, but it’s all fake underneath.

Take a look at how people caught her using some photoshop action:

meet the author

Andrew is a dark blue speck in deep red Central Washington, writing with the conviction of 18 years at the keyboard and too much politics to even stand. When not furiously stabbing the keys on breaking news stories, he writes poetry, prose, essays, haiku, lectures, stories for grief therapy, wedding ceremonies, detailed instructions on making doughnuts from canned biscuit dough (more sugar than cinnamon — duh), and equations to determine the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. A girlfriend, a dog, two cats, and two birds round out the equation, and in his spare time, Drewbear likes to imagine what it must be like to have spare time.

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