close

Politics - News Analysis

Newsmax Host Who Was Fired From Fox News for Sexual Misconduct Loses His MIND Over Biden Eating a Salad

Maybe he should have had his face in a bucket of KFC?

By

Despite the fact that they support a man who walked up the steps to Air Force One with toilet paper on his shoe, the right-wing media does everything they can to stoke fires against a guy who uses NICE nicknames and likes two scoops of ice cream.

But ice cream isn’t what got Newsmax’s Eric Bolling rolling mad at Biden. No, it was a salad.

Some genius at the network found a clip of Biden eating a salad at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, apparently too slow for Bolling’s tastes. Incidentally, I’m not sure Eric has ever tasted a salad.

“Here’s the president of the United States, the man with the nuclear codes at his fingertips, grappling with a bowl of lettuce.”

GRAPPLING. That’s what he said. As if Joe can’t put lettuce on a fork and into his mouth — oh, wait, depending on the dressing, we’ve ALL had trouble getting lettuce on our forks. Sometimes you just have to chase it around the plate.

“He can barely feed himself. Just watch this for a second. This isn’t slowed down, this isn’t edited, this is Joe trying to eat a bite of salad. Just watch. Watch. This man has the nuclear codes. Look. That’s the president — That’s the president of the United States! The man who’s gonna push back against Russia, China, North Korea. Are you kidding me?! He can’t even take a bite of his own salad. This man’s not suited for the job for four more minutes, let alone four more years.”

Thank goodness Eric doesn’t have the nuclear codes, because he’s either never had a salad or never seen anyone eat one before.

How do you get this worked up over how someone eats a salad? Has he seen the footage of Trump eating fast food? Did he see how Trump ordered McDonald’s, Burger King, Wendy’s, and Dominos for a championship football team?

THAT guy had the nuclear codes, too.

And of course, Bolling’s guest immediately following the clip of Joe completely normally eating salad like everyone on the planet does if they’re trying not to get blue cheese on their president suit is noted brainiac Ted Nugent, who once soiled himself and refused to change his clothes for a week straight in order to avoid military service.

Yeah, Eric. You’re a totally good judge of what makes someone fit for public service.

Andrew Simpson
meet the author

Andrew is a dark blue speck in deep red Central Washington, writing with the conviction of 18 years at the keyboard and too much politics to even stand. When not furiously stabbing the keys on breaking news stories, he writes poetry, prose, essays, haiku, lectures, stories for grief therapy, wedding ceremonies, detailed instructions on making doughnuts from canned biscuit dough (more sugar than cinnamon — duh), and equations to determine the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. A girlfriend, a dog, two cats, and two birds round out the equation, and in his spare time, Drewbear likes to imagine what it must be like to have spare time.

Comments

Comments are currently closed.

Recent Stories

Trending Stories