Mark your calendars: Trump started celebrating America’s spookiest holiday two days early at a rally in Pennsylvania. The former president showed up to his own shindig looking like he has no idea what a mirror is.

Trump has terrible taste, this we know. It’s bad enough that his taste in women is “stripper-meets-daughter.” It’s bad enough that his suits don’t fit when he spends ten grand on each one. It’s bad enough that his bald spot is so big he qualifies for half-price haircuts. It’s bad enough already, folks.

But the makeup. My goodness, the makeup.

We’ve seen plenty of bad iterations of Trump’s ever-evolving application of his patented bronzer, from “Raiders of the Lost Ark Melty Face” to “Mexican Who Just Got Done Huffing Gold Paint From a Lunch Sack.” But I think this must be the debut appearance of “Are You F*cking Serious Right Now” orange.

Sorry for the swear, you guys, but I couldn’t help it. Just look at this hideous mug:

Look. At. Trump’s Face. This is from his rally last night. My god. pic.twitter.com/hutYEyQbBI

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 30, 2024

Whatever the description is for this look, it doesn’t even share any letters with the word “normal.” This is very definitely not normal. And you can 100% tell that it has nothing to do with the stage lighting or anything other than just being a douchebag with tremendously bad taste who can only utter the words “Keep going.”

Look at it again. That’s absolutely the color that Marco Rubio is in every picture ever taken of him. He’s up there rocking his pale Jimmy Smits vibe as always, and Trump trots up looking like if Violet Beauregarde’s stolen Wonka gum was carrot flavored instead of blueberry.

Oranges are not this orange.

This is that color you pluck out of the 64-pack of Crayolas when you’re 9 years old, and think “What the heck is a Burnt Sienna.” This is the color of the hair of dudes who grow up to be known by their friends as “Rusty.” The man looks like he got a swirlie in a bucket of wood stain.

In an irony to beat all, some of his supporters actually posted a color-desaturated version of the photo and called it the “real” picture:

Here’s the real photo. You have to stop sharing fake stuff or being a part of it. pic.twitter.com/VIHhdtwVR7

— 🇮🇱 🇺🇸 Bobbie Evans (@BobbieE20238239) October 30, 2024

Ma’am. MA’AM. That is not better. Now it just looks like the greyed-out version of a picture of a man who users painter’s tape all the way to his back molars to block off the application area.

Most people, however, simply remarked on one of two things. Either that Trump is trying to look like a person of color — that made up about 30% of the comments — or that he looks more like an Oompa Loompa every day.

What if he IS trying to look a little more brown, and it’s all because of that stupid comedian at his Madison Square Garden rally calling Puerto Ricans garbage? That tracks for a Republican. We all saw even Mitt Romney get into “brownface” for his Univision interview in 2012.

Regardless, this man needs a washcloth and some therapy. And then a stylist.