Opinion

Don Trump Jr. Accused of Doing Drugs at SpaceX Launch After He Openly Rubs Substance on His Gums

Gosh, where have I seen THAT before?

Donald Trump Junior has developed a pretty reliable reputation as a connoisseur of the world’s finest nose candy. It’s not so much that he’s huddled in a corner rocking back and forth like a junkie. It’s just that we’ve seen enough behavior that models stereotypical users that it’s hard to conclude anything else.

But the legacy news media doesn’t seem to want to report on it. And I get it, I really do. Without concrete proof that Junior’s dipping into the booger sugar, anything they report looks like rumors and innuendo.

Even I have to say this is an “opinion” piece because I don’t have x-ray vision.

I would like for someone at a major news outlet to pick this up, though. Junior may have been in southern Texas for a SpaceX launch yesterday, but his pocket was definitely full of Florida snow.

In a scene that literally looks like it’s right out of a movie, Don Jr. very clearly reaches into his pocket, digs around with his index finger, and brings the tip of it to his mouth, rubbing it all over his teeth and gums.

This family is so stuck in the 80s, they even do coke like they’re in the movie Scarface.

It’s not just the classic maneuver, either. If you watch after he turns his head away and turns back, he inhales deeply — a big, shoulder-lifting breath of ecstasy, like a feeling of invincibility.

Social media had plenty to say about it:

It’s easy to make fun, I suppose, but the thing is, it’s not like this is no big deal. The Republicans went after Joe Biden’s kid for having a history of drug use, and they’re just ignoring this. Don Jr. has had actual input on governmental affairs. He’s sat in on meetings. He’s rubbed elbows with foreign leaders.

We’ll see if anything comes of this, I suppose.

meet the author

Andrew is a dark blue speck in deep red Central Washington, writing with the conviction of 18 years at the keyboard and too much politics to even stand. When not furiously stabbing the keys on breaking news stories, he writes poetry, prose, essays, haiku, lectures, stories for grief therapy, wedding ceremonies, detailed instructions on making doughnuts from canned biscuit dough (more sugar than cinnamon — duh), and equations to determine the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. A girlfriend, a dog, two cats, and two birds round out the equation, and in his spare time, Drewbear likes to imagine what it must be like to have spare time.

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