Opinion

Don Jr. Lets It ALL Hang Out, Posts ‘Family’ Photo of Young Kids Making S’mores With One of His Addictions in Plain View

Good god, man. Have some sense.

Donald Trump Junior is surely a disappointment to his old man, now that his addictions are all public. Well, the ones we know about, anyway. We’ve already seen him sweating, fidgeting, and fast-talking his way through many an interview that made it look like he was on some kind of upper. And though he may have given it up, he was once a hard-partying drinker.

But his president-elect dad hates one habit more than anything else: Smoking. So Junior found a way to do it without the actual cigarettes. He uses smokeless nicotine called Zyn. It’s different than chewing tobacco — it’s actually not tobacco at all — and can be easily used in public without detection.

In fact, nobody might have ever known that Junior was a user of the nicotine pouches if he didn’t casually post photos on Instagram of the opened can laying on the table next to his kids while they have a “Games night and indoor s’mores!!!!” as he captioned it.

Here are the photos:

Here are Spencer Trump, who is 12, along with Chloe Trump, who is 10. Let’s hope their mom has 95% custody.

Look at that! Hersey’s chocolate, marshmallows, graham cracker and … Zyn nicotine pouches! Addictive nicotine patches! What a dad!!!

As you can see, the gang is playing “Super Skills” while eating the tasty campfire treat, and it looks like a wholesome family photo. Until you notice the clearly used plastic container of addictive chemicals inches to the left of his daughter Chloe’s s’more-filled hand.

Now, I hate to be nitpicky. In fact, I can’t judge him for using nicotine — I do myself. But I can honestly say that all three of my kids made it through their entire childhoods without being in a single family photo of me smoking, or my pack laying on the table next to them. Especially not when they were 10 and 12 years old, like Chloe and Spencer are.

And really, there’s a simple reason for that. My kids were very smart, but not smart enough not to try stupid things. That means that not only could they easily get into even “childproof” containers, but they might even have tried it for themselves. And the Zyn can is not childproof to begin with. There are literally children’s candy containers that look just like it.

The whole thing reminds me of an attention-seeking duck-lipped selfie girl who seems to always forget you can see her baby in the reflection in the mirror as she takes a scantily-clad selfie. It’s just low-class and gross.

Even his Instagram fans thought so.

“Not the zyn next to the child!” said one user. “I hope he doesn’t get high around his children,” said another. Still another in the comments section of his photo admonished him, “you probably shouldn’t let your daughter zyn at that age.”

I don’t know if it’s his recent breakup with Kim or what, but something’s got Junior just throwing caution to the wind these days. And it’s not like he’s moving slowly with his new girlfriend, Bettina Anderson. She was over for Christmas, and they’ve supposedly only been together since he and Kim broke up.

Everyone knows that was a lie, of course, but he’s not being his usual cagey self.

Whatever the case is, he should at least be a little more careful when it comes to having dangerous substances around his kids. It’s one thing if there’s a glass of wine on the table — kids know they can’t have it, and they wouldn’t like the taste anyway. But fruit or mint-flavored pouches in a canister that looks like a candy tin?

I’m surprised he hasn’t had a kid eat one already.

meet the author

Andrew is a dark blue speck in deep red Central Washington, writing with the conviction of 18 years at the keyboard and too much politics to even stand. When not furiously stabbing the keys on breaking news stories, he writes poetry, prose, essays, haiku, lectures, stories for grief therapy, wedding ceremonies, detailed instructions on making doughnuts from canned biscuit dough (more sugar than cinnamon — duh), and equations to determine the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. A girlfriend, a dog, two cats, and two birds round out the equation, and in his spare time, Drewbear likes to imagine what it must be like to have spare time.

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