Besides owning libs, there’s nothing that Donald Trump and his supporters like to do more than brag. Trump has bragged about his superior genes, his business acumen, his wealth, the height of his buildings, his ridiculous hair, how pretty one of his two daughters is, and any number of other things.

And sure, I could spend time talking about how his genes are responsible for his bizarre walk and his tiny hands. We could bring up how that business expertise has bankrupted 5 different casinos, notoriously the hardest business to bankrupt. We could even talk about how his building was only the tallest in Manhattan after 9/11 — which he tastelessly noted on the news at the time.

Instead, let’s talk about the latest thing Donald and his dummies like to brag about: His son Barron.

Because Barron looks so much like a young Donald, far more than either of Trump’s two other sons, the president has finally gotten over his hang-ups about Barron’s height. He used to be very threatened by it and was reluctant to even pose with his boy for a picture.

Barron is handsome and well-spoken, and though it has nothing to do with talent or drive, he’s very rich. That means Donald thinks he’s the bee’s knees.

Donald has largely left The Dumbest Trump™, Eric, to do meaningless soundbites on also-ran shows on Fox, and left Junior to continue questionably denying a pretty serious drug problem. He only trots out Ivanka for public events, and he only remembers Tiffany even exists when he’s talking about her father-in-law, Massad Boulos.

But Barron, he’s the jewel of the Trump crown now that he’s got his own real estate company and seems to be following in dad’s footsteps.

So, Trump being Trump (and MAGA being MAGA), there’s nothing left to do but lie about how much more wonderful he actually is than we could have ever imagined.

DID YOU KNOW:

– Barron Trump has an IQ of +170.

– He mastered speaking Slovenian, French, Italian, and German.

– He is also a legendary chess extraordinaire.

Drop a ❤️ for Barron Trump! pic.twitter.com/ZvPLf0AR70

— Ivanka Trump 🇺🇲 🦅 News (@IvankaNews_) January 21, 2025

They’re now claiming that Barron has “mastered” at least four languages and has an IQ of 170, which would be quite extraordinary, if it were true. In fact, it would be downright amazing given that his dad speaks at about a fifth-grade level and even his mother hasn’t “mastered” her second language yet.

Without journalists correcting Melania’s English when it goes to print, transcripts of her talking sound like she may bring up moose and squirrel any time as example of frustration.

We know Barron speaks English — we’ve heard it. And the Slovenian thing is pretty easy to imagine, even if we’ve got no public record of it. We did all see the “I like my suitcase” video with his cute little accent in his kindergarten voice.

But with the exception of one Larry King interview where Melania said Barron spoke three languages (without specifying what the third was), even his parents have never claimed he spoke more than two.

Let’s examine what an IQ of 170 looks like, because an IQ doesn’t just measure ability to do math or problem solving or how well-read you are. For example, I couldn’t tell you the first thing about rocket surgery, but my IQ is 146 because I have an enormous vocabulary and a deep interest in things that make you sound smart like etymology and lexicology.

Bill Gates and Stephen Hawking can probably recite pi to 25 or more places after the decimal, but couldn’t pick up a girl in a bar with a quick joke to save their lives. Those guys are estimated to be around a 160 IQ.

Author, architect, political and biblical scholar, farmer, diplomat, and president Thomas Jefferson had about a 165, according to experts.

So for the MAGA claims to be true, Barron Trump would have to be smarter than a billionaire computer scientist, the world’s most renowned theoretical physicist and cosmologist, and the smartest, most accomplished president in American history. AND smarter than me. Maybe that was out of order, I don’t know, I’m not a rocket surgeon.

And the chess? Well, that’s a nice little add-on to a list of things that sound really impressive, but like the rest of the claims, it’s likely false. He was photographed with a chess board once as a kid, and there is, of course, no public record of Barron ever holding a title or winning a tournament, or even just a simple account of a game he played against anyone that someone watched.

Trump’s MAGA fans might not be Mensa material, but they are creative.