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GOP Rapid Response Director Mocked For Voter Fraud Tweet In Response To Elizabeth Warren’s Dog Joke

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We are finding it increasingly difficult to crawl our way out of the ridiculousness today. It would seem that Twitter’s hacking has left trapdoors throughout, down which one can fall and find the most awful, least serious tweets on the nets.

Steve Guest is known as a “Rapid Response Director” for the GOP, and – if the title means anything – it implies that should, hypothetically speaking of course, all of Trump taxes fall from a vault in Deutsche bank, showing Trump owes $250 million dollars to the Russian mob, it would fall to Steve to tell people “rapidly” that it’s amazing it is not $1.2 billion, that $250 million is next to nothing and can probably be paid off by morning.

So we take everything Steve Guest says with a lot of skepticism. Today, Steve is on the case attempting to prevent illegal ballots. He is worried that a ballot might be cast by “Bailey,” Elizabeth Warren’s dog.

You might say, “How does Steve even know that Bailey would vote for Democrats?” To which the obvious response is that dogs are pack animals, they always want what’s best for all. Social programs, education, health care, all that. They are the opposite of me, me, me, and it might explain why Trump hates dogs, the feeling is mutual. You might check with pet snakes for the GOP ballots.

Anyway, knowing that dogs vote Democratic, Steve is on the case:

See?

Steve? Voter fraud is actually a joking matter, since it basically never happens, and in the last three occasions it has happened it’s involved Republicans switching votes, and in the last 2 cases, it involvef a mailman who switched five (five!) ballots and a Republican congressman who committed three felonies by registering in the wrong address … something at which our president might want to look closely. 

Still, Steve wouldn’t let it go:

Pro-Tip* : She was joking!

The perfect response:

Meanwhile, the FBI found that Russians accessed over thirty state databases in 2016 – Trump and Republicans did essentially nothing about that. Last night, Trump admitted that up to 1% of the vote in 2016 was fraudulent, but since he won, he didn’t want anyone looking into that – these things actually happened. But we’re looking at dogs.

Bailey the dog voting will not happen.

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Peace, y’all
Jason
[email protected] and on Twitter @MiciakZoom

Jason Miciak
meet the author

Jason Miciak is a political writer, features writer, author, and attorney. He is originally from Canada but grew up in the Pacific Northwest. He now enjoys life as a single dad raising a ridiculously-loved young girl on the beaches of the Gulf Coast. He is very much the dreamy mystic, a day without learning is a day not lived. He is passionate about his flower pots and studies philosophical science, religion, and non-mathematical principles of theoretical physics. Dogs, pizza, and love are proof that God exists. "Above all else, love one another."

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