Politics - News Analysis
Should Melania Trump and Jill Biden Debate? Twitter Seems to Think it Would Be a Great Idea…
So we’re officially into debate season.
Democrats are cautiously optimistic. Donald Trump can “win” debates by being such a bullying asshole that no one ever really gets around to talking about the things presidents actually do, which would normally bother voters but since the MAGAs live to “own the libs,” it may be Trump’s best strategy. After all, even IF (and we’re not conceding it) but IF Biden has lost a step, Biden has still forgotten more good government stuff in the last week than Trump ever learned in his life. The more the debates focus on healthcare, COVID, race relations, and “real things,” the more benefit to Joe Biden.
Vice Presidential debates have been studied and though they can be extremely entertaining, they don’t move the needle at all unless a candidate allows the other to take unfettered shots the presidential candidate. But this is where having Kamala Harris against Mike Pence will be soooo beautiful to watch. Kamala Harris is a prosecutor, smarter than four of me lined up in a row, and absolutely fearless. She is so good that she could have Pence tamed in the first ten minutes while spending the rest of the time prosecuting Trump – she could even do it college-style where they make her pound a beer after every question. She will kick his ass and Pence will get a good lesson in why he doesn’t talk to women alone.
But if you want to talk about unfair debates that would move the needle. Get a load of this idea:
Omg @DrBiden should debate Melania Trump.
— Molly Jong-Fast🏡 (@MollyJongFast) September 27, 2020
And let’s not pretend that “First Lady” (or gentleman) isn’t an important job. Right now, Melania hold’s the country’s fate in her hands because at any point she might tell Donald, “If you do not do this, I will give an inside interview on what you’re really like behind the scenes” and next thing you know, Trump will be doing what she asks.
Meanwhile, great spouses make their partners that much better.
We think that Melania and Jill need to debate on how to “Be Best” to children. Granted, as a matter of “fairness,” that’s like saying one would like to see the fight that ensues when one drops puppies into a tank of starved sharks. Melania once lied about having a degree in architecture (we’re sure she meant “heels,” how to build the perfect five-inch heels), Jill has a Ph.D. in education. Melania says that she can speak five languages, Jill could say that she’ll agree to debate in any language Melania prefers with the exception of Slovenian. It will be in English. They could agree to debate in pictures, they could debate by drawing pictures, it doesn’t matter.
They could even debate on Melania’s turf and make it a “modeling” debate. Jill would still win. Jill is an extremely attractive woman, but that matters far less than the fact that Jill can smile and look like a person you want to know. Melania … doesn’t have a lot to smile about … especially if she finds herself in a debate with Jill Biden.
Twitter seems to agree:
Dr. Biden would end up teaching Melania several things about how First Ladies act, dress, carry themselves, and overall act like she is the First Lady https://t.co/i6tKIJWlyf
— Martha Rowe 🤦♀️🤪🌌🏳️🌈🇺🇸🇺🇸💖😎 (@MarthaAbella) September 27, 2020
There wpuld bw no real point to it but the entertainment value would be astronomical.
I would pay to watch that event. https://t.co/tviuunrt2P
— 🍞Bread🍞 (@Thebreadgamer) September 27, 2020
Dr. Biden is so lovely. I know she would do everything she possibly could do to keep from laughing in Melania’s face.
— Gailen David (@gailendavid) September 27, 2020
Don't think Melania could pull that off, unless Michelle Obama ghost-writes her answers
— Marc Goldstein (@marcgoldstein_) September 27, 2020
That would be an azz whuppin' in a few sentences. Melania wouldn't stand a chance.
— PandaMonious (@Juniper_Rising) September 27, 2020
Melania need Michelle Obama to hold a debate first so she had some material? https://t.co/8wsaRV6nOV
— STEMtheBleeding – Not a "loser" or a "sucker (@STEMthebleeding) September 27, 2020
Melania will only do that if she can wear an earpiece so that Michelle Obama can feed her answers. https://t.co/TLy5vvpT1U
— aagcobb (@aagcobb1) September 27, 2020
Oh….make it PPV and donate the $ to cover covid related costs for people that lost their health care or their jobs cause of the failure of 45. https://t.co/Vua1O2dXw5
— Morgan Reed (@MorganR68183354) September 27, 2020
The debate wouldn't get past the first legitimate question to Melania:
Moderator: "First Lady Melania, please explain to the American people the many discrepancies in your US immigration process."
Melania: "On the advise of my attorney, I will be taking the 5th on that matter." https://t.co/rhznWMbwlT
— Brent O (@OnlineDetective) September 27, 2020