I just can’t. Seriously, this is just so doggone funny I don’t even know what to say.

Donald Trump did the keynote for the CPAC Texas conference on Saturday night in Dallas. And as he does with most of his speeches, he spent most of the time talking about himself and just how great he is.

After introducing former White House doctor Ronny Jackson to the crowd, Trump talked about the physical exams he received while in office.

“He loved looking at my body. It was so strong,” Trump said. “But he said I’m the healthiest president that’s ever lived. I was the healthiest. I said, I like this guy.”

THE HEALTHIEST PRESIDENT THAT’S EVER LIVED.

That means Trump was healthier than Barack Obama, who regularly played basketball and other high aerobic sports. As opposed to Trump who plays golf and uses the golf cart so often that he even uses it on the green, which is apparently a major no-no in golf world.

Can you imagine Trump doing even one pushup? And can you imagine the scene of him trying to get up after doing said pushup? They’d probably need a crane to lift that gelatinous slob from the ground.

Remember, this is what Trump looks like while he is golfing and partaking in “exercise”.

I just can’t. And I didn’t even get into the disgusting line when Trump said that Jackson loved looking at his body. Trump is gross to look at while he is dressed. Can you imagine that thing naked?

Now of course Ronny Jackson isn’t believable at all. Aside from being a physician, Jackson is a former rear admiral in the U.S. Navy, and he now represents the 13th Congressional District in Texas, which is in West Texas around Levelland. But he was also known to drink and take medications on foreign trips, and gave out medications like the sleeping pill Ambien like candy. Trump nominated Jackson to head up the VA, but once more information was revealed about Jackson’s behavior, that nomination was pulled right quick.

It’s truly unreal. That Trump would say something so obviously untrue that it’s embarrassing. The man truly has zero shame.

WATCH:

Trump says Ronny Jackson "loved looking at my body".

Beyond parody. 🤣🤣🤣pic.twitter.com/XrfXCpRypR

— Holly Figueroa O'Reilly (@AynRandPaulRyan) August 6, 2022