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Ted Cruz Makes Pathetic Attempt to ‘Own’ Stephen King and It Totally Backfires (As Usual)

By and Nicole Hickman

Goodness, I love Stephen King. His books were such a huge part of my childhood and adulthood (yes, I was a weird kid), and his writing has brought me so much joy (and fear). Think about it, this is the man who brought us Pet Cemetery (easily the scariest of all King books), and the Shining, and Carrie…along with the stories that became the classic Stand by Me. One man produced so much incredible art it’s almost hard to believe. I almost forgot Misery, and Doctor Sleep and even The Stand. The man is a genius.

And, he’s also an awesome dude. Lives in Maine, and lives a totally normal life. And I feel a personal closeness with King as I also survived a terrible car accident that nearly killed me, and leaves me in pain to this day (if you’ve ever heard of CRPS, you know what I’m talking about). King even bought the van that hit him and caused him so much pain…something I so wish I could’ve done.

So, when I see people going at King, I almost take it personally. And Ted Cruz, you are on my shit list.

Ted Cruz loves to be “cool”. He probably thinks his Princeton and Harvard degrees allow him that. Remember the time he sparred with Cary Elwes, the star of Cruz’s favorite movie The Princess Bride?

Then Cruz tried to own Elwes and failed (surprise, surprise):

But Elwes had the perfect response:

Now Cruz thought it was a good idea to go after King. The horror master tweeted about banned books, saying, “Hey, kids! It’s your old buddy Steve King telling you that if they ban a book in your school, haul your ass to the nearest bookstore or library ASAP and find out what they don’t want you to read.”

Good advice. If grownups are telling kids not to read something, those kids should find out why.

And Cruz couldn’t help himself and responded with a typical dumb Cruz response:

So far King hasn’t responded, and hopefully he doesn’t. Only a very few school districts have banned the Bible, and that wasn’t their intention. They had planned to ban books with sexual or violent behavior and since the Bible has lots of that, it got swept up in the ban. The Bible shouldn’t be banned, just like any other book. The problem is that the people who are banning books want a world where the Bible is the only book available in schools and the library.

But luckily, the legion of King’s fans have responded for him:

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